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I don't want cancer to define my life. How do I cope with this without losing myself?

Hi, I'm Molly

I’m 33 years old with Stage 4 breast cancer, I’m 18 months into remission. I get a Zoladex shot once a month. I have scans every 6 months. I take aromatase inhibitors everyday. I feel like cancer is a monkey on my back, constantly picking at me in the back of my mind.

My question is for people who have lived with cancer for an extended period of time. How do I find myself again? How do I cope with the constant fear of recurrence and constant reminders of my incurable disease? How do I live with this without letting it control my life?

  • Post #1
  • Fri Aug 13, 2021
Hi, I'm Betti

I’m a 8+ year survivor. I have found somethings that interest me and do them whenever I can. I put my heart to God and thank him every day for what I do have. I truly wish you well, Betti

  • Post #2
  • Sat Aug 14, 2021
Hi, I'm Martha G K.

I was a 10 year survivor and got the surprise of a new and different cancer on my remaining breast. It shook my confidence and belief that I can ever be free of cancer again.
I am trying to face this newest challenge by being active, spending time with family, eating better, and working at improving my artistic skills. All the rest depends on my oncologist to help me fight this sneaky invader that wants to kill me.

  • Post #3
  • Sat Aug 14, 2021

I was diagnosed almost 1 year ago with stage 4C Medullary Thyroid, there’s no chemo or treatment that will help me. I try and enjoy my life and whatever time I have (about 20% chance for 10+years) and not let it control me. It’s not been easy but it’s really not that bad anymore.
FYI if there is a ‘god’ he gave this to you, so why would you thank him?

  • Post #4
  • Tue Aug 17, 2021
Hi, I'm James C M.

Don’t give up, God is in control of everything. I would say to anyone if you know Jesus as your personal savior things are going to be alright. I have had leukemia since 3012 and everything is good.

  • Post #5
  • Wed Aug 18, 2021
Hi, I'm Marcia S E.

God never “gives” anyone an illness.

  • Post #6
  • Wed Aug 18, 2021

I know that there are so many unanswered questions. We live in a broken world. I’m sure God’s heart breaks seeing his children in pain because he loves us so much. He will give you peace and comfort if you draw near to him. Peace to you❤️

  • Post #7
  • Wed Aug 18, 2021
Hi, I'm William J R.

So Why Would you, what??

  • Post #8
  • Mon Aug 23, 2021

Your question is one we all struggle with: how to live in the face of death. For me, it’s been the evolving notion of radical acceptance; the idea that I cannot control my cancer or it’s effects and cannot will myself back to the way I used to be. I accept that I may die in the near future and yet try to maintain hope that new treatments may extend my life. I also try to focus on the present moment – how am I doing right now?
It’s also been helpful to explore, rather than run away from, what it means to die. A number of books explore this subject and I encourage you to seek out those that may be meaningful to you.
I am not a religious person and I don’t believe in any of the pre-baked notions of God’s will, afterlife, etc. but I do believe it’s incumbent upon all or any of us to define and ultimately accept our lives as they are rather than as we wished them to be.
I wish you well

  • Post #9
  • Tue Aug 24, 2021

Ephesians 1:11 "All things are done according to God’s plan and decision
Your god gave you cancer. Don’t you people read this book you supposedly base your life on?

  • Post #10
  • Tue Aug 24, 2021

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